My kids finished school this week. No pomp and circumstance. No feelings of relief or excitement for summer. My middle son said it best, "There's no walking out of the building for the last time or saying bye to teachers and friends. It doesn't feel like the school year is over."
I agree. It doesn't feel like it's over, but it is. And so one day at home spills over into the next, the only difference being that there is no school work to be done first thing now. I hurt the most for those who are graduating. I know quite a few high school and college seniors (my nephew, my neighbor, my high school friend's son, my cousin's son, my dear friend's daughter, a former children's pastor with a high school and college senior). How disappointing this must be for them. They've worked all these years to get to this point, to celebrate themselves and their accomplishments. And now, it's just...over. No prom, no graduation ceremony. When they all left school back in March, they had no idea that they wouldn't be returning so there was no closure. No saying goodbye or putting an end to that chapter of their lives. I had a son graduate last year and another who will next year. I know how I would feel if they were unable to experience that rite of passage.
So, a "new normal". I hate that phrase. It makes me feel as though things will never be the way they were. And though I know some things may be different, it hurts me to think that life is forever changed down to the smallest detail because of this.
I continue to be out of work, collecting unemployment. It was 2 months yesterday since I've been at work. I miss working and I miss my coworkers. I've looked for other jobs during this time but nothing is available that would offer what I left. So, for now, I wait. I've been doing projects at home: painting, cleaning, organizing, updating, etc. I was motivated in the beginning but I find that, with each passing day, motivation is something that is harder to come by. Yes, I'm putting on weight as well, as I'm sure many people are. I try to stay active and watch what I eat, but it's hard when each day rolls into the next. I'm still trying.
The boys seem ok. Since the shelter in place has been lifted and some businesses are opening up again, Zach has been back to work and Joshua has been able to hang out with some friends. They all enjoy each other's company so that is such a blessing and they are able to hang out day after day and entertain each other. Whether it's basketball in the driveway, PS4, or a trip to RaceTrac for a drink, they get along so well. I am truly blessed.
Tomorrow is a high school transition meeting for Elijah. (I can't believe he's old enough to start high school!) It will be via ZOOM, my first, but will hopefully get Elijah prepared to start high school as an ASD student. I am praying that they will all be able to get back to their respective campuses in the fall. Online was fine for a time, but isn't realistically sustainable.
Steven continues working which is great! He will go to his office or work from home, depending on the day. The mall near us just opened back up so we get out sometimes just to go walk around the mall.
God is blessing us during this time with the unemployment. To the point that we are able to use some to bless others who are in worse situations. I am thankful that God is using this situation for good in our lives right now since I know that so many do not feel blessed. Please know that God is always with you and it is not God that has done this to you, but He will help you through.
